You're the th.
There are other(s)
Monday, September 20, 2004
Mood:  | Frightened
Music: Only Hope Bai Mandy Moore
Social: No one
--Four Daiis Until Mai Birthday--
Here I am....cell phone in hand....staring at it....drinking green tea and tryin to think. I tried to call ESTELLER earlier todaii when I heard what had happened to her. I made da mistake on telling JULIAN. He had asked meeh if I had heard from her, I told him not since last nyte when she stopped talkin to meeh last nyte cuz...and then I trailed off. He pressed meeh until I told him and when I did.... ::sigh:: I wish I hadn't. He stood there for a while, staring at meeh blankly until his eyes got all breakie. Then he turned around and locked himself in his room, aint said a thing to meeh since.
::sighs::
Iono what I'm going to do. I'm really worried about both of 'em. I wanna do whatever I can to help em. I kno dat if one of em aint feeling ryte da other one isn't going to be doing oki, and I wanna do what I can to help em but....things seem so impossible ryte now.
I'm scared for ESTELLE. I want her to be oki. I'm scared for how JULIAN takes news. I want him to open up to ppl and talk to meeh because I kno he needs someone ryte now. I'm just so fuckin scared ryte now....::sighs again:: I have no idea what I'm going to do.
......
Well I'm going to try to talk about something else ryte now, cuz if I keep mai mind on this any longer I'm not going to do too well, I myte as well join JULIAN then. I'm going to try to make this work....
Um....I had an oki daii at skewl todaii. I went to da library wiff ROBYN todaii. Tomorrow is twin daii and we were all suppose to dress alike but iono anymore...I talked to SHAY and iono if that's still going to happen. Ryte now I don't really care about much....I don't even care about how close mai birthdaii is. Funni huh? I was all hyped up about dat earlier todaii but not much...and ish not only the situation dats going on ryte now...ish something I have to take care of soon. I have to speak to mai uncle soon....and that's something I'm really not looking forward too. I kno lyke sooner or later when we talk I'm going to bust down cryin....I'm lyke on da bring of tears ryte now, so I kno dat when I talk to him I'm going to lose it. I can't keep mai feelings in too much. I feel lyke I'm going to pop wiff everything I'm feeling. I'm lyke searching everything I have for money...I just can't get mai hands on it....
Uh...well...n-e-wayz, I think I'm going to just go...I can't keep this up much longer. Holla atcha gurl.
THIS is the real Hennessy
9/20/2004 08:34:00 PM
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